The Bar Belle

Bar Belle Blog is Moving!!

2008-10-09T10:53:00.002-04:00

The fine folks at LEO have finally put down their drinks long enough to create a new and improved website -- so now all of our blogs will link directly off the site. This means that I'll be taking this BlogSpot blog down in a week. So just change your Bookmark link to the new link, and we'll resume the party.

Here's the new site: barbelle.leoweekly.com

And remember, we're still working out the kinks ... so don't bitch right away. I've got one use for wine ... and that's for drinking.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-10-08T12:18:00.001-04:00

Found out the other night that chewing Tums does not mask the smell of alcohol on your breath. Go figure.

Something to do this weekend! Livin' on the Fringe ...

2008-10-07T15:17:00.000-04:00

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-10-07T09:14:00.001-04:00

I hear there's going to be an interesting scene tonight at Fuzion (1335 Story Ave.). They're starting a new DJ night for the ladies. Maybe see you there?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-10-06T13:06:00.001-04:00

Forgot to pack underwear in my gym bag this morning. Doh! I'm only slightly mildly disturbed.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-10-03T10:24:00.000-04:00

Sarah Palin is crazy. I'm going to form a "Saras Against Sarah" campaign.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-10-02T09:35:00.002-04:00

Let's make up a drinking game to go along with tonight's debate. What shall it be? Every time Palin says something absolutely ridiculous, take a shot of tequila? If that's the case, you'll be drunk by 8:22.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-10-01T11:24:00.002-04:00

It was just a tad bit too cold this morning to wear sandals ... which is one of the first signs that fall has arrived.

Things to love about fall:

Bloody Marys
Huber Winery's Spiced Apple wine
The smell and crunch of leaves
Football on lazy Saturday and Sunday afternoons
New episodes of TV shows
My birthday
Halloween
Bonfires and smores
Flannel sheets and thicker blankets
Long sleeves
Sweatshirts
Hot chocolate with marshmallows
Chili Cookoffs

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-30T10:54:00.001-04:00

Today is International Passion Day. Unfortunately, I won't be partaking.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-29T11:32:00.002-04:00

For the record, no one bailed me out when my tab went over $100 at O'Shea's one time. Where was the Federal Bail-Out then?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-26T11:12:00.000-04:00

Fridays are God's way of saying, "Bear with me."

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-25T10:41:00.001-04:00

Somebody was smoking with my lungs last night! Unacceptable!

Bar Belle from 9/24/08 LEO Weekly

2008-09-24T10:45:00.002-04:00

Ten Commandments of Drinking

BY SARA HAVENS

While last Saturday’s Gettin’ Drunky in Kentucky was a success (read: we think most of the 50 or so walkers made it to Bearno’s in one piece), I violated some major rules when it comes to drinking, causing a week of shame, regret and a sense of overall douchebaginess. So I thought I’d create the Ten Commandments of Drinking so that others will not suffer the same fate. So that others will not awaken to a sent-message folder a mile long. So that others won’t have to look friends in the face and try to explain why they left “Eat a dick!” on their voicemail at 3 a.m. I think these should be posted in every watering hole across the nation. Read and obey, my drinking disciples.

1) Thou shalt have no other texts after midnight.

2) Thou shalt not act a fool in public — which includes but is not limited to foolish dancing (i.e. “The Running Man” or kicking in any fashion), face-chugging those thou hast no relations with and balancing beer bottles on thy head.

3) Thou shalt not take the name of the City Scoot in vain, for City Scoot will get you home without having to waketh up next to a stranger.

4) Remember: beer before liquor never sicker, to keep it holy.

5) Honor thy bartender and thy bouncer.

6) Thou shalt not kill a drink in less than 10 minutes.

7) Thou shalt not commit drunk dialing, even if it’s to friends on the West Coast. Oh, and I guess don’t commit adultery either.

8) Thou shalt not steal someone else’s drink or seat at the bar.

9) Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor by speaking on off-limit topics like politics, religion and “Gossip Girl” when in the confines of a bar.

10) Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s beer, date or general sense of happiness and contentment. But if they’re being loud, thou can slap them.

Sara will see you in hell. Drop her a line at shavens@leoweekly.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-24T09:38:00.000-04:00

My coffee tastes like poopy-shit.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-23T09:10:00.000-04:00

Tired of dancing by yourself? I tried to get into the groove once but lost my footing.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-22T09:27:00.002-04:00

I've never been so happy to see a flashing time on my microwave. Power and stability were restored last night at mi casa ... after seven long days without.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-19T12:38:00.000-04:00

What is a hipster? Define it.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-18T09:25:00.003-04:00

I was wondering why I hadn't heard from my friends all week ... then news slowly started to trickle in that last Saturday night while I was highly intoxicated I allegedly went through just about every number in my phone and left weird, sometimes mean, totally random texts and/or voice mails and, in true idiot fashion, ended each one with "Eat a dick." Classy, eh? Oh, and it didn't stop at the phone. Turns out when I got home, I drunk MySpaced and Facebooked.

I have only myself to blame ... and that double shot at Wick's.

Here's to laying low. And begging forgiveness.

Listen up, betch — Kelly dishes out fashion advice

2008-09-17T11:02:00.004-04:00

BY SARA HAVENS
shavens@leoweekly.com

I got a few minutes with Kelly, so we had to talk shoes, of course. Here’s a list of 12 — some that suck and some that rule.

Reebok Cross-Trainers: Suck!

Tretorns: Rule!

Old-school Adidas, black and white striped: Rule!

Ironic hipster Nikes that look like they’re from 1984 but were actually made last week in China: Suck! Obvious suck!

Manolo Blahniks: Rule!

Boots with the furrrr: I’ll go with rule!

Jimmy Choos: Rule!

Birkenstocks: Suck! Unless you’re Aunt Susan, then they rule!

High-top pink Converse: Rule!

Jellies: Rule!

Crocs: Suck!

The standard flip-flop: I’m gonna go with rule, only because sometimes that’s all you feel like putting on. Especially at the beach. And the beach rules!

What music do you like?
I like Peaches because she’s rad.

Can I borrow that top?
Absolutely, but I’m not wearing one now.

•••

See Kelly when she opens for Margaret Cho on Saturday, Sept. 20. Here are the details:

Margaret Cho w/ Liam Sullivan (and Kelly)
Saturday, Sept. 20
Louisville Palace
625 S. Fourth St.
361-3100
$29.50-$42.50; 8 p.m.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-17T10:56:00.002-04:00

As your life is spiraling out of control, is it bad that you're watching it from the sidelines while sipping on a glass of Merlot?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-16T09:01:00.001-04:00

Because it's fun to drink by candlelight?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-15T10:06:00.002-04:00

No electricity. No Internet. No TV. Can't do laundry. Can't watch movies. Can't make food. I can at least open a bottle of wine.

Last Reminder

2008-09-12T15:42:00.002-04:00

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-12T11:19:00.003-04:00

Do you ever wake up feeling like you did something really bad the night before ... but at the moment you aren't sure what it is? It's like the guilt shows up before the memory.

Bar Belle from 9/10/08 LEO Weekly

2008-09-11T10:53:00.003-04:00

BY SARA HAVENS

Gettin’ Drunky in KY

This year, the annual Gettin’ Drunky in Kentucky pub crawl turns 5. As one of its founders (parents?), it makes me proud to see my baby all grown up. Well, he still stumbles and drools from time to time, but if you point him in the right direction, he’ll make it there, give or take a few spills.

I know there’s a shit-ton happening this weekend. Trust me when I say you’ll have the most fun if you join us on our march down Baxter and Bardstown (from Outlook Inn to Bearno’s Highlands … that’s 14 bars, Math Wiz) in the name of no cover charges.

Here’s the 411: How much? — Free, unless you want a T-shirt ($10). When? — Saturday, Sept. 13, 7 p.m., Outlook Inn (916 Baxter Ave.). Why? — Because you believe you can actually out-drink me, and I’d like to prove you wrong … or take you home.

In honor of our fifth anniversary, I wanted to say something nice about each bar we stumble into along our journey. Thanks for putting up with us, if even for 15 minutes.

Outlook Inn — Diggin’ the remodeling. Still love your Bloody Marys.

Flanagan’s — You’ve got my Blueberry Ale on tap, sweet Jesus. Love tryin’ your new beers on Thursdays.

Dublin Cellar — Still remember those free Irish Car Bombs.

Molly Malone’s — Your outside patio is heaven on a hot day.

O’Shea’s — Your cheese balls are the bomb — as are your beer selection and waitstaff.

Versatile — Looking forward to meeting you.

Wick’s — Thanks for keeping prices low and beer cold.

Cahoots — Keep it dark, boys. Keep it cool.

BW3’s — Spicy Garlic is the best.

Akiko’s — I sang. I sucked. I conquered.

NV Tavern — Jo makes the best bourbon sweet teas! Have ’em ready, girl.

Highlands Taproom — Where’d my mug go?

The Back Door — My second home. Dibs on the couch.

Bearno’s Highlands — Land ahoy! Good ’za, good beer.

I suggest training now … get that tolerance in shape! Questions? E-mail me at shavens@leoweekly.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-11T10:49:00.002-04:00

Bad day ... and it's not even 11 a.m. yet.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-10T10:42:00.000-04:00

Well, we didn't get vaporized today ... so I have this hangover for nothing! Damn.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-09T10:53:00.002-04:00

Were you aware that this could be the last day on Earth? Click here for details.

So, what do you say about partying like it's 1999 and the end of the world as we know it? I guess I basically exercised for nothing this morning. And that doughnut I passed up ... damn! Guess we'll never make it to the pub crawl this weekend. Or to see if 90210 actually makes it to another season.

I love you all! Anyone got a smoke?

6 days and counting ...

2008-09-08T16:26:00.002-04:00

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-08T09:24:00.003-04:00

Last night's MTV VMAs made me feel old. What's a Jonas Brother? When did Ashlee Simpson get knocked up? How did Britney get "legend" status? I made it to Pink and then had to go to bed. That's what happens when you're old and lost your promise ring in the '90s.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-05T12:57:00.001-04:00

All you need is love ... and if it takes the form of a make-out session in a bathroom, so be it.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-04T09:43:00.002-04:00

Couple things going on tonight of interest:

Louisville Homegrown Music Series: Featuring Ben Sollee and Wodka, The Instruction; 7 p.m.; free; Fourth Street Live

and

Singer-songwriter Teneia Sanders at The Pink Door; 10:30 p.m.; free

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-03T10:02:00.001-04:00

Jon's back in production! I've got three vacation days that I have to use this month! It might rain (my car needs washed)! I like using unnecessary exclamation points!!!!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-02T09:08:00.001-04:00

Karma is a bitch.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-09-01T12:35:00.002-04:00

It's September already! Fall is almost here. And my pub crawl is almost here.

(Remember: Sept. 13 ... don't plan anything that night! The bar-hop starts at 7 at Outlook Inn. Details to come.)

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-29T09:58:00.002-04:00

Why did the farmer start a punk rock band?

(wait for it ...)

He was tired of Hall & Oates.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-28T09:49:00.002-04:00

A bird shit on one of our interns today. Isn't that a sign of good luck or something? Maybe I'm thinking of rain on your wedding day. Or is that just ironic?

Bar Belle from 8/27/08 LEO Weekly

2008-08-27T10:05:00.002-04:00

BY SARA HAVENS

The Face Chug — Everybody’s doing it!

As Bar Belle, it is my duty to keep a blurry eye on trends in the Louisville bar scene. Often I call them out and advise that you steer clear — like drunken texting or Miller Chill. But there’s one activity spreading through the corner taverns in this city that must be addressed and applauded. I’ve been both a perpetrator and victim of this random act — and I must say it’s fun on both sides of the Face Chug.

I scoured the states and located the man responsible for regionalizing the Face Chug. He’s a Louisville native now living on the West Coast. For obvious reasons, LEO Weekly has agreed to keep his identity a secret. He says the Face Chug was invented at Dartmouth College in 2003, and that although there are many variations, “in its purest form, it involves grabbing the collar of a fellow bar patron or bystander and chugging your beer closely in his or her face. Spilling on the recipient is acceptable and, at times, even encouraged.”

Mr. F-C has performed the act roughly 30 to 40 times over the last two years to an array of responses — from high-fives to eye-rolls, and even some re-chug challenges. “I would not recommend doing it to complete strangers,” he advises, “as the act could easily be misinterpreted.” So no Face Chugging on the first date? “I wouldn’t recommend using it as a first move, especially if you are trying to be taken seriously by the recipient. But it could potentially be a conversation starter if the instigator is not extremely clever or coherent.”

I tried it out last weekend on friends and acquaintances and noticed that while men seem to accept and embrace Face Chugging, women take longer to warm up to it. I’d also encourage Face Chugging only with bottles or cans — unless, of course, you’re into F-Cing yourself. I’m not judging.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-27T10:02:00.003-04:00

Waterfront Wednesday -- be there!

When: tonight, 6 p.m.
Where: Waterfront Park, Harbor Lawn (over near Slugger Field)
Who: See Peoples, Ben Sollee and VHS or Beta
How Much: Free!
Why: Because it's good music, and I'll be there bartending, and I want your tips!
To What Extent: Um ... what?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-26T10:20:00.002-04:00

Who would win in a fight -- Lo or Audrina? I'm rooting for Audrina.

Two things finally occurred to me last night when I was watching "The Hills" --

1) Why am I watching "The Hills"? and ...

2) Who is Lauren to have so much power and control over her friends? Why does everyone want to be her friend and deal with all the drama that comes with it? I have no drama in my life, and no one wants to be my friend! Maybe I need some TV cameras following me around ... or maybe I should start a clothing line (Belle Briefs) ... or maybe I should just treat everyone like shit and watch them flock to wipe my ass.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-25T09:33:00.000-04:00

Who would win in a fight -- Pat Benatar or Joan Jett?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-22T09:26:00.001-04:00

Maybe it's a good thing you don't remember what you say or do when you're drunk.

I'm a deck.

2008-08-21T10:26:00.003-04:00

I agree that you make a deal with the devil whenever you consume alcohol. You have to decide for yourself if a night's pleasure is worth the morning's rot. Usually, pleasure always wins, and you just suffer through the morning until you coast into lunch.

But certain foods hinder the next-day healing process ... you know it, yet you still eat it. "Maybe this time these cheese fries will do me right," you think to yourself as you shove em down. And then your body tells you the truth the next day. And your body always tells the truth. For me, it's the food at BW3's and The Back Door. Yummy, delicious, fried-beyond-belief food. But I just can't do it anymore. I won't do it. I shant do it. And don't try to tempt me, even with a dollop of spicy garlic sauce. Just say no!

Anyone got any Tums?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-21T09:29:00.000-04:00

Staff Meeting ... in five minutes! Spike the coffee!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-20T11:45:00.001-04:00

Because penguins can't fly.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-19T11:38:00.000-04:00

Why's everyone so serious? Lighten up already. Have a drink, it'll do you good.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-18T10:29:00.003-04:00

Look who I met, bitches! This is not only today's reason to drink, it's this month's reason to drink.

At nearly 50, Joan Jett still rocks hard.

(Please don't laugh at my attempt to be punk. Pink hair, really?) (Also pictured and keeping it way more cooler than I, my friends Leslie and Megan.)

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-15T10:38:00.002-04:00

I predict some sweet, sweet Dundee Dip in my future. Heaven in a bowl.

Call me crazy, but I also have a taste for Bud Light Lime -- don't laugh! Seriously, it's way better than that Miller Chill crap. It's refreshing. And zesty.

I'm just glad it's Friday. Weekdays are dumb.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-14T09:02:00.002-04:00

In the words of Joan Jett, "You've got nuthin' to lose, you don't lose when you lose fake friends."

Unfortunately, I know exactly what she's talking about.

Anyone not going to the My Morning Jacket show Saturday night? Joan Jett plays a free concert at the Fair.

Bar Belle from 8/13/08 LEO Weekly

2008-08-13T09:43:00.001-04:00

Party Patrol

BY SARA HAVENS

Up All Night Party — Aug. 15
Bluegrass Brewing Company is being naughty again. The coffee-tinged brew they concocted last year with Heine Bros. went over so well, they’re at it again — essentially taking the best beverage of the morning and mixing it with the best beverage ever to create an oatmeal stout brewed with a touch of fair-trade, organic coffee. To celebrate the first tapping of the new brew, BBC in St. Matthews is throwing the Up All Night party Friday starting at 3 p.m. Festivities include games and live music, and pajama-clad employees will serve breakfast all evening.

Volksfest 2008 — Aug. 23
I’ve heard the yesteryear stories of Louisville’s Oktoberfest — a party that would literally shut down parts of Main Street. I’ve heard the tales of the dancing, drinking and debauchery that attracted thousands into downtown. Not sure what ever happened to it, and there’s a smaller version of it in October on Fourth Street, but I recently came across a listing for the first-ever Volksfest next Saturday. BBC and New Albanian Brewing Co. are partnering up for this party that’ll shut down Clay Street between Main and Market. There’ll be German-style grub to go along with a strong lineup of Oktoberfest brews. The free shindig starts at 2 p.m. and continues till midnight.

Gettin’ Drunky in KY Pub Crawl — Sept. 13
Shameless self-promotion: Mark your calendars for my fifth annual pub crawl, which stumbles through the Highlands in the reverse direction of the Bambi Walk. Details to come, but kickoff, as always, is 7 p.m. at the Outlook Inn.

Have you tried the Blueberry Ale at O’Shea’s or Flanagan’s? It’s heaven in a pint. Except you can see it. And taste it. And swallow it. And that, my friends, is something to believe in. Drop me a line at shavens@leoweekly.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-13T09:35:00.002-04:00

Guess what ... these dudes think they've found a real body of Big Foot! Could it be? Check it out here:

www.cryptomundo.com/cryptozoo-news/ga-gorilla-pic/

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-12T09:48:00.001-04:00

I hear there are going to be meteor showers tonight. Do you really need another excuse to drink beer outside?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-11T10:51:00.002-04:00

Drink a beer, do a good deed — Head on over to O'Shea's, Flanagan's or Brendan's today. 100% percent of the restaurants' proceeds will benefit Erica Hughes, the toddler who was shot multiple times in May of 2006. Today she is living with her grandparents (her mother did not survive the attack). Erica will be having her 5th birthday party tonight in the courtyard of O’Shea’s.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-08T09:55:00.002-04:00

Well, I had my fill of $1 beers last night. It's almost as bad as an open bar ... you're trying to pack in as many as you can in a limited time ... I was passed out by 9:30 p.m. Lesson learned. Yes, they're a buck. But pace yourself, woman!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-07T09:22:00.002-04:00

It's the perfect day for a little baseball, don't you think? The Bats have a home game tonight ... which means the $1 beer happy hour is on! 5:30-7 p.m. I hear The Blue Umbrellas are playing. Even better. Good music, good food (hot dogs!) and cheap beer ... is there anything better? Maybe free beer ... so who's got the first round?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-06T09:34:00.001-04:00

I kissed a squirrel and I liked it. Taste of her nutty chapstick. It felt so wrong, it felt so right ...

Weird.

2008-08-05T13:43:00.003-04:00

A very weird thing just happened. And while it has nothing to do with drinking, it just may drive me to drink to ponder its meaning. I'll spare you the details, but I have this one TV show I love. It's been on for 5 seasons, but my favorites were 1 and 2 ... and part of 3 until they killed off my favorite character. Anyway, I just downloaded a song from 3 where my two favorite characters breakup. It's depressing, yes. But I need something sad and somber to help me wallow in self-pity. Anyway, I threw it into my "Current Favs" folder on iTunes, which now contains 59 songs. Here's the weird thing -- it's set on random. And the very next song that came on was also from this TV show, also dealing with the same couple, but it was back in season 2 when they first got together and everything was roses.

So what does it mean? Probably nothing, right? I listen to a depressing song about my favorite TV couple, and immediately following comes a song about when they first got together. I think it's a sign for hope. I'm not currently in a relationship, so I'm not sure how it applies to me specifically, but you never know. Maybe it's saying that, yes, life is hard and sad and depressing ... but there are also memories of good times we'll always have and make. Too cheesy?

Or it could be just a total coincidence and I'm grasping at karmic straws. I must ponder this one over a glass or two of bourbon.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-05T10:56:00.000-04:00

I carried a watermelon.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-04T09:42:00.002-04:00

Schlitz has returned! Apparently, Pabst Brewing Co. in Milwaukee is bringing back Schlitz beer. I'm not too familiar with the nostalgic beer, but I've heard stories both good and bad. Pop the top and let's give it a whirl!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-08-01T09:41:00.002-04:00

Anyone going to the Dave Matthews/Willie Nelson concert tonight? It's going to be hot. Not Paris Hilton hot, but hot hot.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-31T10:03:00.002-04:00

The parental units are coming in tonight to help me find the source of a leak. Which means no Back Door. And no Pink Door. Arg.

Bar Belle from 7/30/08 LEO Weekly

2008-07-30T09:29:00.002-04:00

Beer and butterflies ...

BY SARA HAVENS

Sometimes, sitting at your favorite bar and knocking back a few beers can get boring. So one late evening three years ago, a friend and I came up with the Dundee Tavern Challenge. We were about six beers in, twiddling our thumbs, staring at the 20 taps that towered above. “Wonder how long it’d take to drink one beer from each tap,” I mumbled. “I bet if we split it, we could do it in one night,” she challenged. And so it began, our yearly ritual of drinking all 20 beers (10 each) on draft at the Dundee Tavern. This year we had six participants, with only four finishing and two ending the night at Twig & Leaf.

On paper, 10 beers doesn’t sound intimidating. But these are pints, and a majority are imported, heavy beers — like Rogue Dead Guy, Hefeweizen and Shiner Bock. My tolerance is definitely something I take pride in, but by beer four, let’s just say I was feeling it. I documented the experience this year with a digital recorder, hoping that our many discussions would lead to interesting revelations or musings about world events. Instead, what I transcribed Monday morning included an incoherent discussion on Tori Spelling and dick jokes.

One participant, who we’ll call C-Town, even brought an “activity” to keep us occupied. She recently attended a Life Coach seminar at a friend’s house and figured it would be fun to share her therapeutic knowledge with a bunch of drunks. The first task was picking out an “affirmation” that best applied to you. It wasn’t three beers later that we decided to add the phrase “in bed” after our affirmations. Mine: “People love me for who I am … in bed.” Someone else’s: “My family honors me, loves me and respects me … in bed.” We pretty much ended the Life Coaching after task 2, which involved drawing a butterfly that resembled yourself.

The night’s activities progressively got hazier as the beers went down. Alls I know is I finished. And I’m now on a hiatus from beer.

What color is the sky in your butterfly’s world? E-mail me at shavens@leoweekly.com or go to leobarbelle.blogspot.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-30T09:15:00.001-04:00

Once again, I'll be bartending at Waterfront Wednesday tonight. The lineup includes the Shake Anderson Band, Danielia Cotton and Dave Barnes. It's free, so unless it rains, you have no excuse not to be there (and tip me).

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-29T11:32:00.003-04:00

So check this out ... you can order the world's largest beer at the Heartland Brewery in New York. The "Beer Goddess" pilsner is a 3-liter glass that holds about eight bottles worth of beer. Just imagine how warm the beer would be when you finally get to the bottom. Another downside: It's a steep $49, and you don't even get to keep the glass! Bummer.

Top Party Schools - OU is No. 5!

2008-07-28T16:59:00.003-04:00

Well, well. Once again, my college made the Top 10 list of biggest party schools. It brings a tear to my eye. Like a proud mamma watchin' her baby do his first keg stand.

The following is a list of the top party schools in the nation, according to the Princeton Review's annual survey.

1. University of Florida, Gainesville, Fla.

2. University of Mississippi, University, Miss.

3. Penn State University, University Park, Pa.

4. West Virginia University, Morgantown, W.Va.

5. Ohio University, Athens, Ohio

6. Randolph-Macon College, Ashland, Va.

7. University of Georgia, Athens, Ga.

8. University of Texas, Austin, Texas

9. University of California-Santa Barbara, Santa Barbara, Calif.

10. Florida State University, Tallahassee, Fla.

11. University of New Hampshire, Durham, N.H.

12. University of Iowa, Iowa City, Iowa

13. University of Colorado, Boulder, Co.

14. Indiana University, Bloomington, Ind.

15. Tulane University, New Orleans, La.

16. University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, Urbana, Ill.

17. Arizona State University, Tempe, Ariz.

18. University of Tennessee, Knoxville, Tenn.

19. University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa, Ala.

20. Loyola University-New Orleans, New Orleans, La.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-28T13:12:00.002-04:00

I've got a mosquito bite on my neck that resembles a hickey. If only it was a hickey ...

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-25T11:31:00.001-04:00

You can Twitter my Yahoo, but don't forget about the Google.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-24T09:42:00.003-04:00

So I hear there's a new Irish pub going in at Fourth Street Live. It appears to be part of a chain called Ri Ra and will open this fall. Although I'm always weary of chains, the good news is they're going to have a once-a-week live music night featuring local and national acts. Deal.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-23T11:54:00.002-04:00

Friends don't let friends drink white zinfandel.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-22T12:04:00.002-04:00

The crushed ice at the Monkey Wrench is the bomb. Makes mixed drinks taste even better ... especially gin & tonics and margaritas.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-21T11:11:00.002-04:00

Training for the 4th annual Dundee Challenge begins today. On Friday, as a team of two people, we will drink one pint of every tap at Dundee Tavern. There are 20 taps. 10 beers each. Bring it on. Anyone want to join?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-18T09:51:00.001-04:00

Just about to begin a roadtrip with the parents for 5 hours. iPod check. One, two. One, two.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-17T10:14:00.002-04:00

Beer is food.
Beer is love.
Beer is a best friend.
Beer is never having to say you're sorry.
Beer is your mom.
Beer is Batman.
Beer is the newly-single Sarah Silverman.
Beer is good.
Beer is coffee.
Beer is all-knowing.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-16T10:30:00.002-04:00

Say you're due to go out of town this weekend for a cousin's wedding. And you gotta leave on Thursday. Would that technically make tonight a "Friday" in the eyes of the Going-Out Gods?

Bar Belle from 7/16/08 LEO Weekly

2008-07-16T10:25:00.002-04:00

You might be hungover if …

BY SARA HAVENS

•After 35 minutes, you still can’t find that damn little coffee guy in The Coffee News.

•You wake up with your clothes still on, contacts still in, surrounded by Taco Bell wrappers.

•You’d choose a glass of water over a bottle of Grey Goose.

•You can’t form compound sentences.

•Conjugating verbs is out of the question.

•By the time you compose yourself and prepare to enter the outside world, it’s already nighttime.

•The numbers on your alarm clock are way too bright.

•You utter, and seriously believe, the following four words: I’m. Never. Drinking. Again.

•You experience PTSD-like flashbacks of the previous night’s debauchery throughout the day.

•After checking your phone’s outgoing messages, you experience deep text regret.

•You can’t get your contacts out because your hands are shaking.

•You believe the only cure is a fountain Coke from McDonald’s.

•You know you should feel embarrassed, but you’re not sure why.

•Your ankle is swollen and your pride is bruised.

•You think perhaps busting out the running man while dancing on the platform at Connections may not have been the best idea of the night (see previous entry).

•You make a list of hangover symptoms for your column that’s due in an hour.

All-Star Cocktail

Something major is happening at Slugger Field tonight, and they’re naming a drink after it. The Triple-A All Star Game begins at 7:05 p.m. The “All-Star Cocktail,” the event’s signature drink, consists of Old Forester bourbon (ironically first bottled in 1870, the same year pro baseball began), lemonade and orange juice and garnished with a cherry. Now you’ve piqued my interest! Let’s play ball.

E-mail shavens@leoweekly.com or go to leobarbelle.blogspot.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-15T08:52:00.002-04:00

If you drink your old beer, you can buy new beer. And speaking of new beer -- the Blueberry Ale on tap at Flanagan's is ggrrreeeaaatttt, as Tony the Tiger would say.

Bud goes Belgian?

2008-07-14T13:55:00.002-04:00

Anheuser-Busch was sold yesterday to Belgian brewer InBev for $52 billion. That's a big chunk of change. So does this mean it'll no longer be American-made? What's going to be St. Louis' claim to fame? What's for sale next? Baseball? Cherry pie? Madonna?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-14T11:22:00.002-04:00

If WTF merged with BTW and BYOB, we'd have BTWBYOFBWT.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-12T04:33:00.003-04:00

Shit the bed ... I took today off, so I forgot to post a reason to drink. Hopefully all you wankers found your own reason ... I went to the Reba concert at Caesars, er, Horseshoe, so I had a good time, I think. Kelly Clarkson made an appearance ...

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-10T11:07:00.002-04:00

Almost forgot to post today ... found an all-ABBA channel on my Sirius radio! Howard Stern's on vacation, so this will kindly fill his place. Ballz-deep!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-09T10:38:00.002-04:00

In the words of the venerable and venereal Harry Caray: If the moon was made of cheese, would you eat it?

I say, only if the oceans were full of Merlot.

Hey! I'm a Cubs fan and a Bud man. Heyyy!

Happy birthday, Max.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-08T11:52:00.002-04:00

Anyone see "The Bachelorette" last night? She picked the wrong tool. The "rad" snowboarder over the yuppie dad? What was she thinking?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-07T13:47:00.002-04:00

I got attacked by mean mosquitos this weekend ... and now my legs look like a strawberry patch ... a deadly, itchy, scary strawberry patch.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-04T11:09:00.001-04:00

Happy Fourth of July! May the loud, costly fireworks drive home that patriotic spirit. Yeehaw!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-03T11:47:00.002-04:00

It's a four-day week, so technically today is like a Friday. Except that I have to bartend down at the Waterfront both tonight and tomorrow. Guess my only night to play is Saturday ... so what's going on?

Bar Belle from 7/2/08 LEO Weekly

2008-07-02T10:12:00.001-04:00

Ode to R Place

After nine years of doing time behind the bar at R Place Pub, I’m hanging up my bottle opener and calling it quits. I like bartending, don’t get me wrong. And I love R Place, with its hodgepodge of devoted regulars and loyal staff. I just need my weekends to be free so I can, you know, do more research on the other side of the bar for this column.

When I told some of my regulars a few weeks ago that July 6 would be my last day, they scurried back to their table and quickly concocted this plan: They’d drive from Lyndon to the Highlands to pick me up in the morning and send me home in a taxi that night — after successfully and soberly completing my shift, that is. I was genuinely touched by their offer but reminded them that I have this other job Monday morning that requires me to fire on all cylinders — it’s no good starting the week off with a hangover, I’ve learned.

Here’s what I’ll miss the most: My boys Sled, Scooter, Dennis and Greg who keep me company on boring Sunday afternoons. Phil’s cheese fries. My fellow bartenders, most of whom have been there longer than me, like Leigh and Jen, and the ones who keep it interesting, like Heather, Don, Stacy and Greg. Owners Cres and Scott, who were patient with me from the beginning, when I was the slowest, greenest bartender ever. The savage Steelers fans who fill up the bar during football season (hey, Tom and Rosemary, save me a seat!). And the great gatherings, like the staff Christmas party, riding on the St. Patrick’s float and Thunder Over Louisville (hope I’m still invited).

Magic Hat #9 — good beer

If you like Blue Moon, you gotta try Magic Hat #9. It’s got a little hint of apricot and is tasty and refreshing, especially in this sticky summer weather. I know they have it at O’Shea’s, Flanagan’s, Brendan’s and the Hideaway. If you don’t like it, I’ll buy you a Jagerbomb and make fun of your taste in beer.

The R Place cheese fries are seriously one of Louisville’s best-kept secrets. E-mail me at shavens@leoweekly.com or check out leobarbelle.blogspot.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-02T10:10:00.001-04:00

The sun seems really bright today. Is it just me?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-07-01T09:38:00.002-04:00

So I get a call last night at 2am from my drunken friends who are vacationing in Alaska. Apparently they couldn't do the math to figure out that although it may be 10pm and still daylight where they're at, it's 2am here. They called to tell me they were enjoying a Maker's Mark, so all was forgiven.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-30T10:22:00.002-04:00

There's a fine line between having a nice buzz and being completely smashed. One minute you're perfectly content watching a drag show, the next minute you're up on a platform dancing with strangers. So now it's Monday and I have a sprained ankle. You can guess how that night went ...

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-27T14:17:00.002-04:00

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
I need a drink
And so do you!

Lame.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-26T13:09:00.001-04:00

When's the last time you corn-holed?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-25T11:54:00.002-04:00

Waterfront Wednesday is tonight, sons! I'll be bartending as usual. 1) It better not rain. And 2) You drinkswillers better tip me!

As always: It's free. Here's the lineup: Sonny Landreth, The Elders, Katie Herzig

Starts at 5pm and takes place at the Harbor Lawn, which is on the right side of Waterfront Park, opposite of Joe's Crabs.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-24T11:04:00.002-04:00

Despite my penchant for unhealthy habits, my teeth are in great shape, so says my dentist. Unfortunately I had to endure the 10-minute torture session of flossing and scraping and polishing ... and they didn't even let me pick the flavor!

If hell involves being strapped in a dentist chair while getting poked and prodded with drills and sharp tools, let me repent now!

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-23T09:20:00.002-04:00

Mondays are never pleasant. Even when the sun is shining bright and the temperature is a perfect 70 degrees, the landslide of a new work week will bring you down.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-20T09:36:00.002-04:00

OK, so I didn't see you at The Fervor show on Wednesday. To tell you the truth, I didn't even make it to watch them play. I mean, I made it to the Pink Door and saw the opening band. But I had to bail before they took the stage. Gotta get some sleep in sometime! Anyway, they're playing again tonight at the Bats game, around 5:30. I'm definitely going to make this one. I swear. And the promise of $2 Rolling Rocks has nothing to do with it.

So join me at the game. And then we can catch the Pride parade roll by afterwards at 8. Now who's going to make sure it stops raining?

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-19T13:15:00.001-04:00

It's my mom's birthday today! Happy Birthday!

(This isn't a "yo mama" joke, I swear. Or I woulda said it's your mom's birthday, duh.)

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-18T12:02:00.002-04:00

The Fervor plays tonight at The Pink Door. The Orange Opera opens. It's free and starts at 10 p.m. Ask yourself this: Do you really need eight hours of sleep? Can't you stay up late just once this week? Sure you can!

Bar Belle from 6/18/08 LEO Weekly

2008-06-18T11:51:00.002-04:00

BY SARA HAVENS

Vegas vacation
Vegas is my kind of city — with free drinks and 24-hour buffets, you can’t really go wrong, unless you actually go to gamble. I’m one of those people who screw the system, but I’m OK with it. I can sleep at night. I’ll stick $10 in a machine just as the waitress is passing, get my free cocktail and then cash out. I just got back from Vegas last week and am unhappy to report that the casinos are cutting down on free cocktails, it seems. They’ve got fewer waitresses (at least in the nickel-slot areas), some no longer offer top-shelf liquors and some, like the Wynn, don’t offer free cocktails at all.

I still had a fun time, though. Met Elvis, saw Barbra Streisand dealing black jack and ate at the Pink Taco. Really. And when I accidentally set my top-shelf margarita (free Patron tastes even better!) on the video poker “Max Bet” button while sitting at the bar, I actually won $36. So maybe this gambling thing isn’t bad after all.

Sunny and soused!
As the temperature rises, so does my thirst for margaritas. I’d argue it’s one of the best summer drinks, second only to the mojito. Just as a Bloody Mary keeps you warm and fed in the wintertime, a margarita keeps you chilled and stripped of clothing in the summer. There’s a certain risk we all take in ingesting the salty cactus sap that is tequila, and that makes it all the more fun. I recently stumbled (literally) across two upstanding Louisville restaurants that offer great margarita specials, and by great, I mean you can taste tequila. El Mundo (2345 Frankfort Ave., 899-9930) in Clifton offers strong-ass $3 margs on Wednesdays and Thursdays, and Seviche (1538 Bardstown Road, 473-8560) has them for $2 on Sundays. They’re best served on the rocks, with salt and lime. And don’t even ask for flavors, that’s not how we roll. Olé!

Tell me about more drink specials at shavens@leoweekly.com or leobarbelle.blogspot.com

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-17T09:39:00.000-04:00

I'd rather be one toke over the line than six feet under it.

Today's Reason To Drink

2008-06-16T10:11:00.002-04:00

My 20-year-old intern Jane says that everyone should drink for her. She works 50 hours a week and can't even enjoy a happy hour.

I remember being 20. I would chase a bottle of Strawberry Hill Boone's Farm with a Zima. And I still thought I was cool. Live and learn.